Wednesday, August 30, 2006

"Do It Yourself" at your own risk...

All I can say is TraceyF posted this last year. While catching up on her blog it had me laughing so hard my colleagues must have thought me insane. It strengthened my resolve to NEVER "do it yourself" but always see a professional. I don't know who the woman was who experienced this, but it deserves another posting. Thanks Tracey!

Hair removal 101...God love the woman who shared this...

All hair removal methods have tricked us with their promises of easy,
painless removal - The epilady, scissors, razors, Nair and now...the

My night began as any other normal weekday night. Come home, fix dinner,
and play with the kids. I then had the thought that would ring painfully
in my mind for the next few hours: Maybe I should pull the wax out of
the medicine cabinet. So I headed to the site of my demise; the
bathroom. It was one of those cold wax kits. No melting a clump of hot
wax, you just rub the strips together in your hand and then they get
warm and you peel them apart, press it to your leg (or wherever else)
and hair comes right off. No muss, no fuss. How hard can it be? I mean
I'm no girly girl; I am mechanically inclined enough that I can figure
it out. *YA THINK!!!*

So I pull one of the thin strips out. Its two strips facing each other
stuck together. Instead of rubbing them together, I get out the hair
dryer and heat it to 1000 degrees. Cold wax my rear end (Oh how this
phrase haunts me!)

I lay the strip across my thigh. Hold the skin around it tight and pull.
OK so it wasn't the best feeling, but it wasn't too bad. I can do this!
Hair removal no longer eludes me! I am She-ra, fighter of all wayward
body hair and smooth skin extraordinaire. With my next wax strip I move

After checking on the kids I sneak back into the bathroom, for the
ultimate hair fighting championship. I drop my panties and place one
foot on the toilet. Using the same procedure I apply the was strip
across the right side of bikini line, covering the right half of my
v-g-na and stretching down to the inside of my butt cheek Yes, it was a
long strip)

I inhale deeply and brace myself. RRRRIIIPPP!!!!

I'm blind!!! Blinded from pain!!!!....OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!

Vision returning, I notice that I've only managed to pull off half of
the strip. crap!!! Another deep breath and RRIIPP. Everything is swirly
and spotted. Do I hear crashing drums??? OK, back to normal. I want to
see my trophy - A wax covered strip with my hairy pelt that has caused
me so much pain, sticking to it. I want to revel in the glory that is my
triumph over body hair. I hold up the strip! There's no hair on it.
Where is the hair? WHERE IS THE WAX???

Slowly I ease my head down, foot still perched on the toilet. I see the
hair..The hair that should be on the strip. I touch. I am touching wax.
I run my fingers over the most sensitive part of my body, which is now
covered in cold wax and matted hair.

Then I make the next BIG mistake...................remember my foot is
still propped up on the toilet. I know I need to do something. So I put
my foot down. noo!!!!!!!! I hear the slamming of the cell door.
V-g-n-Sealed shut. Butt?? Sealed shut. I penguin walk around the
bathroom trying to figure out what to do and think to myself "Please
don't let me get the urge to poop. My head may pop off". Hot water!!
Hot water melts wax!! I'll run the hottest water I can stand into the
bathtub, get in, immerse the wax covered bits and the wax should melt
and I can gently wipe it off right???


I get in the tub - the water is slightly hotter than that used to
torture prisoners of war or sterilize surgical equipment - I sit. Now,
the only thing worse that having your nether businesses glued together
is having them glued together and then glued to the bottom of the tub.
In scalding hot water. Which, by the way, doesn't melt cold wax. So, now
I'm stuck to the bottom of the tub!! God bless the man that convinced me
I should have a phone in the bathroom!!!!! I call my friend thinking
surely she's waxed before and has some secret of how to get me undone.
It's a very good conversation starter "So, my butt and who-ha are stuck
to the bottom of the
tub!" There is a slight pause. She doesn't have a secret trick but does
to hide the laughter from me. She wants to know exactly where the wax is
located on bottom "Are we talking cheeks or hole or what?" She's
laughing out loud by now...I can hear her. I give her the rundown and
she suggests I all the number on the side of the box. YEAH!!!!! Right!!
I should be the joke of someone else's night. While we go through
various solutions. I resort to scraping the wax off with a razor.
Nothing feels better then to have your girlie goodies covered in hot
wax, glued shut, stuck to the tub in super hot water and then dry
shaving the sticky wax off!! By now the brain is not working, dignity
has taken a major hike and I slip into glazed donut land.

My friend is still talking with me and my hand reaches towards the
saving grace....the lotion they give you to remove the excess wax. What
do I really have to lose at this point? I rub some on and OH MY

The scream probably woke the kids, scared the dickens out of my friend,
but I really don't care. "IT WORKS!! It works!

I get a hearty congratulation from my friend and she hangs up. I
successfully remove the remainder of the wax and then notice to my grief
and despair.................................

THE HAIR IS STILL THERE.......................ALL OF IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So I shaved it off. Heck, I'm numb at this point.

Next week I'm going to try hair color......


Tuesday, August 22, 2006


Today was the follow-up appointment for my surgery. Since it was in the middle of the morning, I actually got to sleep in and take my time, a luxury I don't get on a normal business day. I got down there with time to spare. They office wasn't busy because she was on OB call with the ER so they can't fill her schedule just in case there's an emergency downstairs.

So anyway, I don't have to wait more than 10 minutes before she comes to get me. I really really like her. She's young, hip and has such a great bedside manner. And a fun sense of humour. I had brought a really cool MP3 player with me that has the ability (besides doing video) to record sound as well. So V. showed me how to work it so I could tape the appointment since he couldn't be there. When she calls me in she's looking at me with this big silly grin. She's genuinely happy to see me and when I ask why the big grin she says "have you lost weight?" God I love this woman. :) In actuality, I probably have lost 3 or 4 pounds since she saw me July 12th but it's always nice to have someone say something.

I pulled out the U10 and set it recording telling her that I'm going to tape our conversation since V. can't be there. She calls out to the device "hello, hi there, hello" just to him. :) I then hop up on the table and she takes a look at the scars, pokes around a bit and deems me in great shape. Asked how things were as well. For the most part, I'm doing really well. I've got no pain at the incision sites, but sometimes get little pains. Since I had my appendix out about 6 years ago, I'm fairly sure that these pains are just little things that will go away - nothing to be concerned about. The only thing I do have that is a bit of a pain is that when my bladder is full (and that's fairly often since I drink 2 litres of water a day minimum). It's pretty painful and of course once my bladder is empty, it still hurts as it returns to its regular size. I mentioned this. She asked if it was like that before the surgery (nope) and I said it showed up about 2-3 weeks ago which correlates with when I went back to work and resumed my water intake. She said keep an eye on it and let her know if it gets worse. My own personal diagnosis says that this is because a) I've got further to walk to the bathroom now that our office area moved so it's full longer b) the main fibroid's location was posterior in my uterus and was distorting it's shape. I'm pretty sure that she told me at an earlier appointment that the fibroids were pushing my uterus up and back so now that it's settled back down to where it belongs; it's just above my bladder. So when my bladder is full, it's pushing into the uterus. Who knows if I'm right, but it sounds good to me.

She asked us when we wanted to start trying again. I told her that was one of V.'s questions. It's not like we haven't been practicing or anything, but we obviously can't do anything that will risk me getting pregnant until she gives us the okay. I went in armed with the knowledge that when we start the protocol with the clinic that it will take about 6 weeks before we reach embryo transfer, so I was hoping she would say November. That is about midway of her original 3-6 months. Sure enough, I didn't even have to say anything, she said November. That means after my November period, we can start to try. I'm happy with that.

She goes through the reports that she's got and says that the pathology report for the fibroids says that they were benign which is also great news. It's rare for them to be malignant but always a relieve when she confirms all is well. She gave me a copy of the reports for my records and one for my family doctor and sends me on my way. Her parting words were essentially that we better let her know when we're expecting. I told her not to worry, that we'd be back as we had every intention of having her be my OB. :) And with that I was on my way.

So knowing that V. wants to try again I let him know when I got to the office what she'd said. He's a bit disappointed because he sees that as three months. However, I reminded him that my cycles are only 28 days and that my November cycle will be right at the beginning of the month. In fact, I checked the calendar. I will actually be getting 2 cycles in October, one at the beginning and one at the end, so as soon as he gets back from Vegas we're good to go.

I told her that V. wants us to try to see if we can conceive naturally before we move to the donor scenario. I'd love for us to have a child that was biologically ours but there is so much going against us for that and I know V. would too (as evidenced in his post below).

1. I'm going to be 46 next month. There is a less than 5% chance that we will conceive naturally. I know it's possible, but it's so much harder.
2. Also, being 46 means that there is a greater chance of birth defects and disability. "The risk of having a child with Down syndrome increases in a gradual, linear fashion until about age 30 and increases exponentially thereafter (Figure 1).8 The risk of having a child with Down syndrome is 1/1,300 for a 25-year-old woman; at age 35, the risk increases to 1/365. At age 45, the risk of a having a child with Down syndrome increases to 1/30." If you look at the chart associated with that link, that is a greater than 3.5% chance of having a Downs child. This scares the hell out of me.

Now don't get me wrong, if V. wants to try we will, but I want him to be realistic. It's taken so long to get to where we are I don't want to take much time trying to conceive naturally, especially once we've managed to secure the funds necessary to move forward with the donor. Now, don't misunderstand me. I'm not saying that having a child with our donor means absolute success. I'm being realistic here. However, it greatly increases our chances of success, while bringing down the percentage to less than 0.5% to having a Downs baby.

Anyway, we'll wait and see how things go. In the meantime, everything is looking positive and we're moving forward. Always a good thing.

Monday, August 21, 2006

Tomorrow's Checkup

So DW is off to the checkup with Dr. L alone. Unfortunately, we are buggered by timing as we do not want to reschedule since the doc is so in demand. I have to be in class for work for the next four days so I cannot attend with her. While we are not really concerned about complications or issues, it will be a bit of relief when we get the official clearance from the doctor. One thing DW has to speak to her about, though, is this uncomfortable feeling she gets in her abdomen when her bladder is full. It may be nothing but it seems to happen all the time now so I am a little concerned about that. The other obvious thing we want to know is when we can continue forward with our plans. Let me tell you, while everything else moves forward, I am anxious to give it the old college try to get things doing the natural way. I hate DW having to go through all of this (as well as our good and extremely generous friend). Plus, if somehow it can be a product of us both, I know it would mean something extra to us both, especially after all this time and trials. Don't get me wrong, I am not frowning upon any opportunity for parenthood with my dear wife, but I'd be lying if I said I did not wish there was not some miracle that would allow us to have it between us alone.

Such is life. I just want my wife to get a clean bill of health. Anything beyond that is simply gravy in my eyes. I was blessed in life with my first child. I was blessed again when I found my soul mate and life partner. I will be equally blessed when, by whatever means, we become parents together. We have a lot of living and loving and we hope to have yet another child(ren) to share that with. And the child wants a sibling or two so we would like to give her that too. Time will tell, but we will keep hoping and we will keep trying.

Thanks for your continued support during our little adventure. Peace.

Wednesday, August 16, 2006

We apologize for the change in programming

In case some of you have seen some posts appear and then disappear, I wanted to clear up any confusion. No you have not lost your minds. My husband has his own blog (see my blog roll) as well as being a contributor to this one. He claims that when he uses the Blog This option when he's on a web page, it defaults to my blog. So I end up reminding him that he's done it again and I move his post. One day, he may remember. :)

Monday, August 14, 2006


I was tagged by Penny.

1. YOUR ROCK STAR NAME: (first pet and current street name)

__________ Oakridge - yeah I was deprived, no pets except a turtle and I don't think it had a name.

2. YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME: (grandfather/grandmother on your mom's side, your favorite candy)

Esther Tootsie Roll

3. YOUR "FLY GIRL/GUY" NAME: (first initial of first name, first two or three letters of your middle name)

P. Sar

4. YOUR DETECTIVE NAME: (favorite color, favorite animal)

Blue Tiger

5. YOUR SOAP OPERA NAME: (middle name, city where you were born)

Sarah Toronto

6. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: (the first 3 letters of your last name, first 2 letters of your first name, first 2 letters of mom's maiden name and first 3 letters of the town you grew up in.)

Ass-Pa-Ne-Tor - somehow, anything with Ass in it just sounds wrong

7. Terrorist Name:

no comment

8. SUPERHERO NAME: (your favorite color, favorite drink)

The Blue Blizzard - I know that's not really a drink, but it sounds good :)

I'm tagging Jenny, AnnMarie, Shazz, and Meri-ann

Sunday, August 13, 2006

They found their way home!


For anyone who's not following this post will help make sense. :)

Friday, August 11, 2006

What's in a name?

1. Use the third letter of your first name to determine your new first name:

a = Fantasia
b = Chesty
c = Starr
d = Diamond
e = Montana
f = Angel
g = Sugar
h = Mimi
i = Lola
j =Kitty
k = Roxie
l = Dallas
m = Princess
n = Heidi
o = Bambi
p = Bunny
q = Brandy
r = Sugar
s = Candy
t = Raquelle
u = Sapphire
v = Cinnamon
w = Blaze
x = Trixie
y = Isis
z = Jade

2. Use the second letter of your last name to determine the first half of your new last name:

a = Leather
b = Dream
c = Sunny
d = Deep
e = Heaven
f = Tight
g = Shimmer
h = Velvet
i = Lusty
j = Harley
k = Passion
l = Dazzle
m = Dixon
n = Spank
o = Glitter
p = Razor
q = Meadow
r = Glitz
s = Sparkle
t = Sweet
u = Silver
v = Tickle
w = Cherry
x = Hard
y = Night
z = Amber

3. Use the third letter of your last name to determine the second half of your new last name:
a = hooter
b = horn
c = tower
d = fire
e = thighs
f = hips
g = side
h = jugs
i = shock
j = cocker
k = brook
l = tush
m = sizzle
n = ridge
o = kiss
p = bomb
q = cream
r = thong
s = heat
t = whip
u = cheeks
v = rock
w = hiney
x = button
y = lick
z = juice

My maiden name: Princess Leather Thong
My marreid name is: Princess Sparkle Heat

Borrowed from NikkiNix

Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Progress is normal (TMI for some)

I'd say my recovery is progressing at a normal rate, apart from my lapse in judgement this weekend when we went to visit my BIL and SIL in Ottawa who have a 23 month old. Auntie was in high demand. Considering I was a little sore the next day, I probably did a bit too much with him, with the lifting and all. But it was fun!

From a cycle perspective (TMI to follow), I got my period for the first time since the surgery and it was right on schedule. For that alone I was thrilled. I've always been 28-29 days like clockwork, and sure enough, 29 days it was. Plus, the best part (if there can be a best part for this) is that it was a normal flow. None of this "the flood gates have opened run for your lives" flow. No longer do I need to use double protection of the super variety. Yippee!!! And on top of all that, it 4 days and it was done. (I know, some of you probably hate me.) Plus it seems like the extreme back aches may have stopped. I still get the headaches, but not the blinding migraine type. So all in all, I'd say things are going pretty well.

Surgery was 4 weeks ago today! Two more months of imposed rest, then we'll see where we are.

Monday, August 07, 2006

And now for something completely different

One of the many things that V. and I have in common is our warped sense of humour. Within days of meeting each other we discovered a mutual love of Monty Python. We were both quoting lines from Holy Grail that those around us just didn't get. So when the Broadway show, Spam-a-lot, opened we both knew that it was something we wanted to see. This summer the touring show has come to Toronto for a limited run ending September 10th.

As an early birthday present (mine isn't until late September) V. took me to dinner and the show on Friday night. Dinner was very nice at Baton Rouge. We ended up eating at the bar because the restaurant was full due to it being summer, Friday night, as well as the first day if the Caribana weekend (which we aren't participating in this year). I have to say the show was absolutely hysterical and definitely earned it's 2005 Tony for Best Musical. We laughed through the whole show. I think the woman next to me was crying she was laughing so hard. It was money well spent.

If you're a Monty Python fan, go see the show. If you're not, then watch Holy Grail, Lfe of Brian and a bunch of the other MP movies, and you should be good to go.

Get not that kind

These guys always make me laugh.

Reprinted without permission from

Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Do you or don't you?

As I'm in this required waiting period while I recover from surgery, I have lots of time to think and ponder. Of course, a day doesn't go by that I don't calculate when we may be able to start the protocol. However, that's not all that runs through my head.

V. and I have on several previous occasions said that when we get pregnant we weren't telling anyone for 3 months. However, I put it to him the other day, what do we do now that I have loyal readers who are supporting us through all of our ups and downs, offering advice, support and just being there as an ear? How do you not say anything to family, but let those who are riding the roller coaster with you, be happy (or sad) with you? The problem here is that we have many of our friends and few family members reading the blog. So it makes it that much more difficult to tell one group when parents and siblings may be kept in the dark. A further possible "complication" was if there was any validity to a supposed superstition that my cousin had told me about back when she was expecting her first child. She said that there was a jewish superstition that if someone asked if you were pregnant you weren't supposed to lie and say no (if you were). Now I'd never heard of such a thing, and when I googled, I couldn't find anything online either.

So, I thought I'd ask Projgen, a Jewish woman who is on this IF ride as well and is extremely knowledgeable in the practices of her/our faith. I wanted to know if she was aware of any such superstition. She hadn't heard of it either, but she responded with an answer that was helpful in terms understanding where that superstition could have originated. I'm going to quote her answer in its entirety. Thank you Projgen for you help.

I've never heard of a superstition about lying about being pregnant, but in general, Judaism frowns on lying. Prevaricating is okay, but outright lying is bad ;) Maybe someone in your cousin's immediate family combined the idea of not lying and pregnancy and made a new custom/superstition! In my in-law's family no one would ever wear green - they believe there is a superstition about Jews wearing green. Can't find any information about that, either, so I have a feeling some family member long ago must have been wearing green and died a tragic death. So, therefore, wearing green is bad.

It sounds like you know the more common superstition of not telling anyone you are pregnant until after the first trimester. The background to that (so I've been told) is that when people are very happy for you, wishing you well, you get distracted with self-pleasure, providing HaSatan (not the xtian Satan: an opening to come and steal the baby's neshama, or soul. After 3 months, the baby is strong enough (and the chance of miscarriage plummets) to protect itself from HaSatan. Personally, I think that stems from the fact that the majority of miscarriages happen in the first 3 months, so the HaSatan story came about as explanation. But also, it saves the parents having to deal with multiple explanations if they were to announce it to everyone right away, and then Gd forbid, miscarry. That would too much additional emotional trauma.

So an explanation, but I'm still back to what do we do when the time comes?

I'm leaning towards keeping it real and telling everything on the blog. After all, I started writing here to keep a journal of what we were going through, knowing that there would be (unfortunately) thousands of others in the same situation would I would be able to draw strength from, as well as support others myself. How do I go through our protocol, keeping everyone in the loop, and then when it's time for the two week wait, and the betas, not say a word? I don't know if I could do that? What would you do? How have you handled this?