And so it begins...

Yes, you read that right. It's CD2 and we're cycling!!!

It seems that the stars were aligned and things fell into place a few days ago and we were able to go ahead with our final cycle.

In the midst of all the G.20 nonsense going on downtown, I had to go to the clinic on today for blood work and ultrasound to get started. Considering the rioting and violence that was going on the previous night, I wasn't sure if the clinic was going to be open as is located down in the area where the protesters were roaming around last night. I gave them a call in this morning to be sure they were open and then headed down. Traffic was very light, and so I got downtown in record time. I usually park in the hospital garage but it was closed up as were other parking garages, so I had to find street parking. Luckily not a problem. It was rather surreal walking down to the clinic to pass police officers stationed on the street with their riot gear hanging off their belts. (Police headquarters is up the street from the clinic.)

Anyway, once up in the clinic, it was business as usual with a packed waiting room. Signed in on the boards for blood, ultrasound and to see the RE. It was probably an hour wait to be called for ultrasound (blood took 2 minutes). I had a trainee tech as well as the head ultrasound tech, so I was part of a teaching session. Not a bad thing because it meant they discussed what they were seeing so I had confirmation that I have a very small subserosal fibroid (which I knew). My OB had told me back in December about it and didn't seem concerned. I forgot to mention it when I talked to the RE. I'll have to try and remember to ask him when I'm back for the lining check.

When I finally got in to see him, we discussed that the protocol is essentially the same as the last. However, he was agreeable to me starting the fragmin today with the rest of the meds. He also looked over the blood results from March when I was there and asked if I'd ever had my thyroid tested. I said no, even though like every other overweight female I've thought that it's sluggish. :) In any case, the results showed that the number has gone up since December (I had written them down, but can't find them now) and I'm now showing as borderline. So he called over to the lab to ask them to run my TSH, T3 and T4 and as well put me on Levothyroxine.
So, my daily med schedule is as follows:

7am (when I get up)

5mg folic acid
50mg B6
1000mcg B12
baby aspirin
4mg estrace
5mg prednisone
2500 iu fragmin
0.05mg Levothyroxine

3pm
4mg Estrace


7pm
2500iu Fragmin

11pm
4mg Estrace
5mg prednisone
multi vitamin

I had to put reminders in my blackberry to make sure I remembered the mid day meds. ;)

So, I have to go back in 10-13 days based on my schedule for a lining check, and depending on how it is, transfer would be 3 days later. Based on my past response, I've not usually had an issue building my lining, so if I go back in on July 8th or 9th, then transfer would be the 12th (no Sunday transfer) or 13th.

So that's where we are. :)

And just because a post is not complete without a cake photo, here is a picture of the cupcakes I made last night....

Orange-Almond cupcake with Orange buttercream
Margarita cupcake with Lime buttercream
Chocolate cupcake with Marshmallow cream filling and Vanilla buttercream
Peanut Butter cupcake with Chocolate ganache and peanut butter cups

The chocolate ones taste just like a Hos.tess cupcake. :)

An update, sort of?

Well, it's not really an update because nothing has really changed. We're still in a holding pattern, with the hope that we'll be able to cycle in July. It's not too late for June if something changes as I'm about 10 days away from CD1 but I'm not holding my breath for that.

Thank you to everyone who made suggestions about fund raising. There were some great ideas. I've been busy baking cakes for a couple of paying customers (my first!) which has kept me busy. I was trying to figure out how I could do an online bake sale through my blog. I kept running up against the whole shipping issue. Anyone local could always pick up an order but it could get expensive to ship, especially outside of Canada. Sending cookies and brownies are easy, but I'd want to offer up cupcakes as well. Anyway, I'm still working on that idea...meanwhile, I've got a basic website pulled together. I've got to do it up properly and fix the images, but at least there's a web presence.

And, what would a post be without a picture of a cake...
These are up on the site, but here are the last two cakes I made.

Happy Anniversary DH!

Today we celebrate six years. Six years of wedding bliss. Yes, we've had our challenges but we've weathered them together and come out stronger. You have always been there to pick me up when I fall. You are my biggest champion and supporter. You make me laugh. You finish my sentences and you steal my thoughts. You push me to be stronger and try new things. You are my best friend. You are my soul mate. We go together like peanut butter and jelly, or ham and eggs. You complete me. I look forward to many more years together. I love you.

Please sir, I want some more?

The answer to that question would be a resounding no.

Right now I’m feeling somewhat defeated, as I told a friend. I don’t talk about much beyond cakes and our final upcoming FET here. I feel like I’m betraying V if I bitch about finances or other stuff that may be of a more personal nature. It’s like the old adage “don’t air your dirty laundry”, so I don’t. But I have to vent, and I’ve already checked with V that he’s okay with this.

Things have been rather tight for us over the last few years financially but we’ve managed, and in that time been lucky enough to do some things we’ve wanted to do including the IVF cycles. Our last FET was in September/08. We had enough stuff coming up in the next 6 months that it seemed prudent to take a break, then there were doctors appointments in an effort to see if we had missed anything, and finally we felt we’d done all we could and the only thing left was to go for it and do the FET. Except that fate had it that financially we weren’t able to do so at the beginning of the year. V knew I really didn’t want to delay too long and we were advised that we should try and do the cycle as soon as possible because of my “advanced” age. :)

For those of you who have been reading along, we thought at the beginning of the year we’d be able to go ahead for March. That got postponed due to finances until April/May. Then we had it all worked out. V works for the public sector and he would be getting a bonus as he has in the past, and we’d be able to go ahead with the cycle in June. Any other expenses, including vehicle license renewals (V’s birthday is this weekend), were covered and I was good with that. We didn’t seem too far off our planned schedule. But oh, how wrong we were. Some unexpected expenses came up and then his employer decided to interpret a new government ruling that was to be effective May 1st how it best suited them, and back dated it, screwing every employee who was eligible for these bonuses. That meant that the bonus he would be getting would be substantially lower than the one that was expected. This now means that no FET in June. And we don’t even know if we can do the FET in July.

To say I am unhappy would probably be an understatement. I’m sad and I’m angry and I’m frustrated, and I have no idea how/if we’re going to be able to do this. I know that V feels the same way. His anger is palpable about how he feels betrayed by the organization he works for. So now, we have to crunch the numbers and see if we can do this in July. I look at the calendar and my birthday is September. It’s a significant birthday. I never thought that I might be 50 and still trying to have our first child. I had hoped (as I have every year for the last 5 years) that I would be pregnant on my birthday. Now, I don’t know. I will now be at the end of the IVF spectrum at 50. This is truly our last chance. I never imagined that I would have to face the real possibility us not being successful.

So, maybe someone will smile down on us and we’ll strike it rich in the lottery. :) We all know that’s impossible. I’d raise the funds somehow if I could figure out a good way. If I could I’d be making and selling cakes out of the back of my van, but that’s not realistic either. I think I would have to get orders for something like 500 cupcakes….I can’t even imagine. LOL.

Anyway….that’s where we are. Not exactly where we wanted to be midway through May.